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Joke of the Day

"How old were you on your last birthday? Eight. And how old will you be on your next birthday? Ten. Oh I don't think that's possible. Oh yes it is - I'm nine today."

"Overheard a phone conversation today **Father** - ""What has a small dick and hangs down? **Son** - ""What?"" **Father** - ""A bat. What has a big dick and hangs up?"" **Son** - ""What?"" ""click"""

"Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween? Because so many witches are sweeping the sky."

"I dropped my glasses in the toilet today. Now everything looks like shit."

"I googled ""where do ninjas live?"" no results were found. Well played ninjas. Well played."

"The word of the day is: bishop My sister fell down the stairs, i had to pick the bitch up"

"What's the opposite of the word uncle-off-her? It's an aunt-*on*-him."

"I lost my dog and I don't know if I'll ever find him. I don't have collar ID."

"RIP Boiling water You'll be mist."

"Doritos has a new snack called ""Taco Explosion"" so I'm suing Frito Lay for stealing my term for what occurs an hour after eating Taco Bell."