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Joke of the Day

"Why are Pakistan not allowed to play football? Because every time they get a corner they set up a shop."

"I thought it was called a Fist Bump Why not call it a Finger Bang?"

"What's the difference... between a girls mouth and a girls vagina? There is none! I want my penis to be inside both of these things."

"That's a nice ham you got there It'd be a shame if someone put an ""S"" in front and an ""E"" behind it"

"The NSA Agent Why couldn't the NSA agent leave the Russian airport? Because he got Snowden!"

"Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He used to lie awake all night wondering if there was a dog."

"My life is an open book. But it's very poorly written and I die in the end."

"""I have a particular set of spills,"" Liam Neeson says, eyeing his soiled shirt. He looks for a napkin but the last one's already been Taken."

"What do you call a cow with five legs? Rare."

"WD-40 is amazing stuff. ...But I should have used a condom."