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Joke of the Day

"If every day is a gift, I'd have to say today was a Fruitcake from Last Year Day. Recycled, disappointing and held together by booze."

"Hot singles in your area are tired of it all. Just so tired."

"Why do pigs never recover from illness ? Because you have to kill them before you cure them !"

"My son donates his hair to charity & people are all, ""Sweet."" I donate the people in my basement's & people are all, ""We have a warrant!"""

"Why doesn't Gabe Newell play basketball? Because he can't make 3's"

"Did you know Avatar is a sequel to Titanic? It picks up where Titanic left off, in the sense that half the cast is blue and dying. Obligatory edit: Frontpage on /r/jokes! Wohooo!"

"If woman had apostrophes instead of periods, they'd be even more possessive and prone to contractions."

"Q: What do you call a clock on the moon? A: A lunartick."

"Kanye West was hospitalized... Our thoughts and prayers go out to the hospital staff at this difficult time."

"I don't know if this american election is an actually presidential election or an iq test These damn american's are sure failing the IQ test"