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Joke of the Day

"I met a Mexican with two dicks He called one Jose and the other Hose B"

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"Guy paying for condoms at Walgreens got asked if he needed a bag He said back to cashier, ""Nah, her face ain't that bad."""
"How did the hipster narco escape from prison? By going underground"
"What do white guys have bellow their hips thats hard and pleasures women Credit Cards"
"""We were trapped in the elevator and had to make a terrible decision"" Which was? ""We ate Bill"" OMG. How long were you in there? ""4 minutes"""
"How far can a rabbit run into the woods? Halfway. After that she's running out of the woods."
"Nerdy pickup line. Hey baby, Are you uranium because I'm Iodine and if it was up to me I would rearrange the periodic table around and put U and I together. ;)"
"Why Pyongyang the capital of North Korea? It is the same noise the elastic bands that launch their nuclear missiles make"
"Mom said angels are watching over me I'm just afraid they're taking notes to make sure I go to hell."
"Just watching that movie where Julia Roberts has a lot of teeth."