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Joke of the Day

"My wife and I used to describe our marriage as 'forever', now we both prefer the term 'ad nauseam'."

"One of my buddies lost his right arm in a car accident which is a huge bummer, so much money wasted on tattoos"

"I get the whole 3 meals a day thing but I'm confused about how many at night?"

"I'm a Poet... and I didn't even realise until just then."

"Why couldn't the crime scene investigators find the murder weapon? They thought it was a piece of cake."

"Why did the guy give up connecting his controller to his Xbox? He was syncing too much time into it."

"I told my daughter we might be getting a blizzard and she asked for one with Reese's pieces"

"What would you say to Hitler if he was sick? Hey, ill Hitler!"

"Another poor soul worked at a company making blankets. He lost his job when the company folded."

"James Bond slept through an earthquake He was shaken, not stirred."