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Joke of the Day

"Met a cute guy at the gym we like all the same movies and he loved my shoes. We have a movie date tonight and he's bringing his boyfriend."

"So proud watching my son fight invisible monsters in the outfield while the ball rolls right past him."

"What don't homeless people get? Knock knock jokes"

"I asked a beautiful homeless girl if I could taker her home with me. She said, ""Yes!"" With a big smile... But that quickly changed when I walked away with the cardboard box that she lived in."

"First Guy (proudly): My wife's an angel!' Second Guy: You're lucky, mine's still alive."

"Merry christmas and happy new year! - Internet explorer"

"Some of you change your avi like I change my underwear. Every three days."

"At a business meeting: ""How about SuperCupid?"" ""No, expectations will be too high"" ""GreatCupid?"" ""Lower"" ""Uhhh, OKCupid?"" ""Brilliant"""

"Dear whoever is playing sweet child o' mine at 2:30 in the night at full blaring volume to disturb the whole neighborhood......NICE!"

"Why do Jewish people have short necks... (Shrugs Shoulders) I don't know."