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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between E.T. and a Mexican? E.T. learned English and wanted to go home."

"When I undress there is a radiant shower that falls. Not of money or glitter, but of dog hair."

"Did you hear about corduroy pillows??? They're making headlines!"

"You know what they say If the water slide is broken, the log ride's still open!"

"I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom... ...until they are flashing behind you."

"Teleportation seems like an awesome idea until Creepy Stan from down the street is suddenly washing your back in the shower."

"I saw Don Draper driving a toupee across a high-wire. Another character driven piece on cable."

"Swiss cheese is cheating cheese cause there's holes where there could be more cheese stay woke."

"I called the Paranoia Hotline: This guy answered and said, ""How the hell did you get this number?"""

"You know how some people call their erect penis a 'hard on'? What do evil midgets call it? A *minion*"