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Joke of the Day

"A three-legged dog hobbles into an old western saloon He limps up to the bartender. ""I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."""

"Why does the US name Arkansas Arkansas Because Its Arkansas not YourKansas"

"Why was the scalar depressed? Because he had no direction."

"Aggressiveness is in the eye of the beholder. Until he punches you in the face. Then aggressiveness is inbetween the eyes of the beholder."

"A Jew, a Catholic and a colored boy go the heaven. Does anyone know the rest of this joke? Judge Schmels was telling it to the Bishop in caddyshack. And never told the punch line."

"It is said that the Welsh were the first to use condoms, by making them out of sheep intestines. But the English perfected this technique by removing them from the sheep first."

"So my friend told me that he has been constipated for the past three weeks... I'm pretty sure he's full of shit."

"What do you call a woman with two brain cells? Pregnant."

"If you are wondering how many ketchup packets you can put in a Holiday Inn hot tub before people stop going in, the answer is 9."

"Nobody gracefully gets out of a beanbag chair."