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Joke of the Day

"What did one sperm say to the other? How are we gonna find an egg in all this shit?!"

"What does a cab driver have in common with a pool cue ball? The harder you hit them, the more english you get out."

"I eat pudding with a fork, so no, crossword puzzles aren't really my 'thing'."

"Why are programmers bad at doing laundry? They throw all their dirty clothes on the heap."

"Remember that time Joe Biden succeeded the previous vice president? That was a dick move."

"How does a Welshman find a sheep in tall grass? Attractive"

"Must spend less time with my dogs. Haven't bitten the mailman yet but I am starting to circle three times before sitting down."

"Learned from my 2yr old tonight that Jesus doesn't like bananas. No word on cauliflower yet but pretty sure he's not a fan."

"I went to the doctor the other day and he told me I need to quit masturbating I asked why and he said ""because I'm trying to examine you!"""

"I had an Irish 7 course meal A potato and a six pack"