170123
Joke of the Day
"Only after getting married you realise that those husband-wife jokes were not just jokes."
Next Joke
"whats the difference between a girl and a bus? ""What's the difference between a girl And a bus"" ""What?"" ""As more people that go in the bus the tighter it gets"""
"How do you get a New Yorker upset about ISIS terror attacks? Tell them ISIS are Red Sox fans."
"My pick-up line used to be ""Hey babe, I'm a hotspot. Wanna log-on""? doesn't work anymore, now they just yell at me ""fuck off you homeless begger""."
"It's just an alarm clock Really, it is. http://imgur.com/tdZrIAB"
"[God creating mosquitoes] ""I wonder how I could get everyone to spray chemicals on themselves and also slap their own faces."""
"My wife asked me to go out and get something that makes her look pretty. So I went out and got drunk."
"How do you guys think the Germans will do in the Olympics this year? Not too well considering they can't finish a race."
"Should be interesting when Trump meets the UK's prime minister... I wonder if he will shake her hand or grab her by the pussy"
"Have you heard about Unilevers ice cream It was their magnum opis. (Yes, I know next to no one will get this joke at all)"