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Joke of the Day

"When people show me pictures of their kids, I show them pictures of my exes If I have to look at their mistakes, they have to look at mine."

"I asked my racist granddad what does he think should be illegal... His reply, quite unsurprising, was ""Youth in Asia"" ."

"For me sex is like a game Single player"

"What did the pirate say after he pulled a steering wheel out of his pants? ""It's driving me nuts!"""

"How many McDonald's counter girls does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it and one to put some chips with it."

"2003: Fear that ppl from the internet will find me in real life. 2013: Fear that ppl from real life will find me on the internet."

"I'm a people person, but from a distance."

"An immigration officer asks a drunk man if he's Hungarian he says ""yep, but my name's not Arian"""

"Imagine us waiting for 2016 and all of sudden comes 2015 s"

"Henry IV got injured while bowling. One could say that he, Bolingbroke, while bowling, broke."