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Joke of the Day

"My parents are so impressed with my brothers daily 10 minute workout. I can do it in 8."

"Missed Connections: hey, are you that woman I saw? Any of them? Call me."

"Alcohol is a misunderstood vitamin."

"Ever read a book or see a film that touches you so deeply it changes your whole worldview? I just took a shit like that."

"What do you call a Mexican fist-fighting with a pedophile? Alien vs. Predator"

"What's the handicapped parking situation at the special Olympics?"

"Selling racist jokes at $1 per person... ... or 60 cents for black people."

"There's been a lot of lightbulb jokes lately I'd say it's a hot topic."

"I use the internet to tell me what the weather's like. How do you do that? I carry my laptop outside and if it gets wet I know it's raining!"

"I named my penis Richard That's long for Dick Hey - at least it's not another Turkey joke."