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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a cross between... a Mafia Don and post-modernism? An offer you can't understand."

"Why does nobody ever talk about Jack the Ripper's sleazier French cousin? Jock the stripper."

"Who started the campfire website? Some bright spark."

"Please, call me Seahorse. Mr. Seahorse was my mother."

"Me: You're such a good boy. Dog: *tail wagging* Please leave the room so I can eat the couch."

"lol so good https://soundcloud.com/yung-palmtree"

"June was sore. She scolded Ward Cleaver. ""You were awfully hard on the Beaver last night Ward!!"""

"I have to say the best part about being over 30 is how short and easy hangovers get. Haha, kidding, it's 7PM and I'm actively hoping to die."

"Why didn't the lifeguard save the drowning Hippy? Because he was too far out, man."

"What's a pedophile's favorite food? I'm not sure, I only watch the children eat."