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Joke of the Day

"I don't like snakes, but ""Diarrhea on a Plane"" would be a lot scarier."

"An ideal homework excuse Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: Our furnace stopped working and we had to burn it to stop ourselves from freezing"

"What do you call a bald porcupine? Pointless!"

"What if the weather talks about us?"

"I can tell when my skincare puns make you cry by how moisturiser."

"I've just been dumped by my girlfriend. She found me creepy because I have a nickname for my penis. Guess now that I'm single again, I'll have to take Matters into my own hands."

"Most of life is waiting for whatever you're at to be over."

"Zootopia It'll either make your kid more tolerant or turn them into a furry."

"Waiter is there soup on the menu ? No madam I wiped it off !"

"Jewish woman why do jewish women only sleep with jewish men? they wont touch anything that isn't 5 percent off."