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Joke of the Day

"An ideal homework excuse Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: Our furnace stopped working and we had to burn it to stop ourselves from freezing"

"How do you know when a mongol is level? He's drooling from both corners of his mouth."

"If everyday is a gift, I want to know where I can return Mondays."

"The Most Dangerous Place on the Planet! Those BASTARDS!!! It's a [death trap](http://www.savagemill.com/wp-content/uploads/StoreFront_HandsOfTime.jpg)..."

"A friend of mine has a left foot fetish. It's just not right."

"What's Shakespeare's favorite video game? Sonnet the hedgehog"

"Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are in a plane crash, who survives? No one, the was a major gas leak, and someone lit a match, and the plane exploded, killing everyone inside."

"Why were the two homosexual melons protesting at city hall? Because they cantaloupe"

"What did the baby owl's parents say when he wanted to go to a party? You're not owld enough."

"The real power of a man... Is the size of the smile on his woman's face sitting next to him."