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Joke of the Day

"What do you get if you cross a duck with an avocado? Quackamole"

"My mum is a rat bag Roses are red violets are blue but mummy I love you so much (in a sarcastic way) I'll change the sentence in a more simple way I love how much homework you give me. NOT!"

"Laziness is a dish best served delivered."

"A cop stopped a man smoking cannabis while driving The officer asked ""how high are you?"" The man replied ""no officer, its hi how are you"""

"It'd be nice if the pre-requisite to being a politician in the United States of America didn't involve being a lying sack of shit."

"In American politics, what's important is that you pick one of two equally bad sides and defend it no matter the awful garbage it produces"

"What does an astronaut do when he gets angry? He blasts off:"

"In some ways it's sucks that we are smart enough to understand the futility of life. But luckily we're also smart enough to invent alcohol."

"I went to the Zoo the other day. There was only one dog in it. It was a Shitzu"

"What's a pirate's most favorite letter? [A letter of marque](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Letter_of_marque)."