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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a tribe of pygmies and an all-girl track team? Pygmies are cunning runts."

"ME{from upstairs}: Honey, I'm gonna take a Buble bath WIFE: You mean bubble bath, dear ME: Right MICHAEL BUBLE: Are you getting in or what?"

"why is it hard to explain puns to a kleptomaniac? because they always take things literally!"

"Everyone makes fun of North Korea's military Personally, I'm amazed and terrified. Just imagine what they would accomplish if they opened their eyes."

"Yo mamma's so fat when she went on vacation, the locals correctly identified her as an American"

"I don't really care who came first, the chicken or the egg. I'm just glad somebody decided both could be broken and fried."

"What's the difference between an angel and a Scotsman? To one you say, ""Hey you, get off my cloud!"" The other: ""Hey McLoed, get off my ewe!"""

"Why did the elephant paints it's toes red? So he could hide in the cherry tree."

"I've just installed strobe lights in the bedroom. It makes the wife look like she's moving during sex."

"What would twitch.tv's mafia be called? El Kappa"