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Joke of the Day

"ME{from upstairs}: Honey, I'm gonna take a Buble bath WIFE: You mean bubble bath, dear ME: Right MICHAEL BUBLE: Are you getting in or what?"

"This dermatologist waits a month to diagnose a skin disorder... She's reluctant to make a rash decision."

"What you call a crocodile covered with tortillas? A tacodile"

"I ate some bad Greek food now I falafel."

"I just found out that there's a dating site for people with mullets and the people who love them. Lol! *looks over shoulder* *signs up*"

"Deep down, we're all that one lady in 7-11 with her bathrobe on."

"To avoid being eaten by zombies, go to Settings / Home Invasion Settings / Cannibalism / Brains, and then uncheck the ""tasty"" box."

"Where did the meteorologist stop for a drink on the way home from a long day in the studio? The nearest ISOBAR!!"

"I prayed to God for a handbag and he gave it to me It's a blessing and a purse."

"If you text ""Haiti"" to Pat Robertson's phone number, $10 will be deducted from his account and sent to Haiti."