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Joke of the Day

"I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, ""Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!"" I said, ""Wow!"" Then her friend said, ""She means 666-3629."

"Can we please stop with the holocaust jokes? My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off the guard tower."

"I went for a job interview. The bloke asked, ""Where do you see yourself in 10 yrs time?"" ""Same as now - in photos and mirrors,"" I replied"

"It is completely unreasonable that family members are expecting me to remember things like what the names of their kids are. Preposterous."

"Two guys in Ohio die and wake up in hell The paramedics revived them"

"The flight attendant keeps saying ""Please stop asking for peanuts. Busses don't have flight attendants."""

"The doctor told me I should stop masturbating today. So I look him straight in the eye and asked him ""why?"". And then he said something about not being able to work in these conditions."

"[OC] Where do all the cutest electrons hang out? A d orbital"

"Why was the password a bad attorney? [OC] He was case sensitive!"

"I saw a sign the other day the made me fucking piss my pants... ...it said ""Bathroom Closed"""