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Joke of the Day

"Why shouldn't you date a tennis player? Because love means nothing to them!"

"What is both a fruit and a vegetable? Elton John in a coma."

"Why did the Japanese American bring his server with him? He thought they said internet camp"

"Did you hear about the psychic midget that escaped from jail last night? Yeah, there's a small medium at large!"

"What did Jesus said to his girlfriend in the morning? ''Damn, you really nailed me last night''"

"What do you call a funny mosquito? Malarious -My gf's homemade joke"

"Doctor and Patient. Doctor: ""I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live."" Patient: ""What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!"" Doctor: ""Nine."""

"What did the egg say to the pot of boiling water? Sorry, I was just laid by a hot chick....it's going to take me a while to get hard again."

"Do retarded people know that they are retarded? Person A: Do retarded people know that they are retarded? Person B: I don't know, do you?"

"this nation needs a monument dedicated to its teens. how about a giant middle finger carved out of a mountainside"