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Joke of the Day

"The best way to avoid awkward moments with homeless people is to ask them for money before they ask you."

"The difference between erotic and kinky: Erotic is when you use a feather. Kinky is when you use the whole chicken."

"What was the dentist's horrific gastronomical invention? Tartar sauce."

"So a black kid asks his dad..."

"Want to hear a joke? Women's sports"

"Exactly when in American history did Americans stop having British accents?"

"there are some really great cocktails you can have when it gets cold. Gin and coffee, gin and hot water, microwaved gin, go nuts"

"Life; It's all about finding the next good time."

"Today I went down on my girlfriend Period."

"If you are trading Cephalopods, it's important that you exchange those that are of equal size and value. You know.... Squid Pro Quo"