16681

Joke of the Day

"The longer a Facebook photo of someone's kid goes unliked, the stronger I become."

"Jewish Pizza What is the difference between a jew and a Pizza? The pizza does not scream when you put it in a oven."

"I just got mistaken for an employee at a haunted house. Assume it's because I look authoritative not because I look like I'm wearing a mask."

"I went to the library and asked for a book on rohypnol. That's the last thing I remember."

"Priest and a Rabbi are walking down the street. They pass a playground where a little boys playing. The Priest says to the Rabbi, ""Hey you want to screw that kid?"" The Rabbi replies, ""Out of what?"""

"You know what happens when you put the toilet seat up? that's the joke"

"I'm starting to think that all those hours in school when I practiced writing my autograph was just a waste of time....."

"What do you call a sexy cousin? 87.5% unrelated. (Shamelessly stolen from [Two Guys and Guy](http://www.twogag.com/archives/3023))"

"""Saint""? You had one job, Kardashian-West family. Go make another kid, and this time name it Wild Wild."

"What do girlfriends and ass hairs have in common? They never let shit go."