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Joke of the Day

"I helped a little old lady at the market today.. She was too short to grab a box of cereal from the top shelf, so I stood on her shoulders!"

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"I learned today that I'm still a reddit noob."
"If we're all God's Children... What's so special about Jesus ?"
"Why was Joseph late to the meeting? He was Stalin."
"[counseling] She gets angry a lot ""He took me camping and left me in the middle of nowhere"" YOU SAID YOU LIKED SURVIVOR, KAREN"
"The hardest part about being a kick ass dude is wiping the poo from your kick ass boot after a hard day of work."
"Got my new Chinese cookbook today....""101 Ways to Wok Your Dog"""
"Q: What do pelicans eat? A: Anything that fits the bill."
"My phone autocorrected ""killed"" to ""kilt""... Well plaid, phone... Well plaid."
"Electrician jokes Ohm my god, watt the fuck, breakers be trippin'"