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Joke of the Day

"How many Police Officers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, they were too busy beating up the room for being black."

"ATTENTION: We will be performing live power tool identification exercises today. This is not a drill."

"I know exactly how President Obama feels. Every time my kids are forced to listen to me, they make angry Republican faces."

"My waiter asked, ""would you like sour cream, bacon and chives on your potato?"" ""That's a loaded question."""

"A Joke for all the Arabic speakers out there Why did the Saudi restaurant get in trouble? They put the Umm Ali next to the Baba Ghanoush."

"Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day, but give a fish a man and he'll be like WTF is this I ordered worms I can't eat this"

"I have a photographic memory it just hasn't developed yet"

"They told me I had to move to Northern Canada. I said I want none of it."

"Grilled cheese is just regular cheese that's been forced to account for its whereabouts last night between 9:30 and 11."

"I bet all those girls that ignored me in high school would still be pretty pleased with that decision"