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Joke of the Day

"I was very confused the other dah I was discussing religion with a man and he claimed to be a ""moose limb"". Must be some kinda canadian thing I guess."

"What did Pat Benatar say to the kid throwing cereal at her? Stop using Chex as a weapon!"

"I think the Oscars would be a lot more interesting if they had a ""Best Nip Slip"" category... or ""Best Back Burger."""

"It's almost Valentine's day It's almost Valentine's Day and I don't even have a date, even the milk carton has a date."

"It's a doge eat doge world out there. Such cutthroat. Very survival of the fitter"

"Pretty unfair that sharks get a whole week and vampires only get a weekend."

"i love how flies rub their hands together like little criminals"

"At what age do you have THE talk with your daughter about how she is not the princess of anything and she'll need to get a job. Is it 6?"

"RABBIT HUSBAND: You look even better after a full day of work. I don't know how you do it, honey. RABBIT WIFE: They test cosmetics on me."

"What do you get when you dissolve Zyklon B into Israel's water supply? A final solution"