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Joke of the Day

"For some reason, the Disney movie ""101 Dalmatians"" was much more popular than it's sequel ""Picking up Dog Shit for Eternity."""

"Wife: Ugh, I wish my boobs were bigger. Husband: Try rubbing toilet paper between them. Wife: How would that help? Husband: Well, it seems to be working just fine on your ass."

"What do you call a group of Japanese people running up a hill? Tsunami Warning"

"AT&T and T-Mobile are getting married! There will be no reception."

"Carlsberg don't do Alzheimer's ... ... but they do make exceedingly good cakes."

"""Stop pointing at my daughter!"" - Kanye West yells at a compass."

"Two drums and a cymbal jump off a cliff... Ba dum tss."

"The sign at the McDonald's I just passed says ""We hiring"" in case you're wondering what kind of qualifications you need to have to be hired."

"Why do melons insist on having big weddings? Because they just cantaloupe."

"What do you call a pirate's girlfriend? His soulmatey"