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Joke of the Day

"Will you tell you the story of the huge sad wall? I shouldn't, you'll never get over it."

"What do you call earrings on a gay man? Queerings"

"I often use ""unnecessary"" quotation marks."

"Being married is a lot like being a DJ... Most nights you just tune out All noise and nod your head..."

"Worry: a waste of imagination."

"A good metaphor for today's youth is the book Peter Pan... Kids sneak out. Get high on dust together. Beat up handicapped man, and steal his boat."

"Wow thank you so much for whistling at me, guy in Walmart. I've never felt more beautiful."

"What do you call an apology written using dots and dashes? Re-morse code"

"How many social justice warriors does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They just hold the lightbulb and cry until the universe spins around them."

"Que es eso? *takes a bite* Queso!"