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Joke of the Day

"Why dont't feminists go to church? They can't stand saying ""amen"""

"Q: What do you call a blonde sky diving team? A: A new version of the lawn dart's game."

"Whats the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can roast beef, but you cant pea soup!"

"[at a bar] CUTE GIRL: *grabs my arm* hey there ME: *mouth full of food* did you know a lobster on a kabob is called a kablobster"

"[texting] ex: your friends were looking at me really strange at the game. me: yeah well I told them you died in a hot air balloon accident."

"What do you call the website Chewbacca started that gives out Empire secrets? Wookieeleaks"

"What gets louder as its gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor."

"""I'm happy with who I am, sure. But I'm not gonna go around calling myself ""great"" like some of these jerks."" --humble white shark."

"You send yourself a message through time. ""Invest in google"" it says. You don't have money in the past either. Nothing Changes"

"(Sexism warning) Yesterday a tree fell on a woman and killed her. What was a tree doing in the kitchen?"