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Joke of the Day

"You can put the word ""blood"" in front of ""oranges"" and people will still eat them. Don't even try it, bananas."

"You know who really likes debates? De fish"

"A wise man learns from his mistakes. A wiser man learns from others' mistakes."

"What's the difference between a whore and a truck? The truck can only take the load from behind where as the whore can take it from anywhere."

"I like my porn just how I like my search history Disabled. EDIT: First post and front page. Woohoo!"

"What's the hardest thing to do when you go rollerblading? Telling your parents that you're gay."

"What's the difference between premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction? One's pretty quick, the other's a quitty prick."

"Sanders supporters are like... that kid in class that gets Fs and Ds the whole semester and then says ""If I get a 100 on the final I can still get a C"""

"How do you lose 30 pounds in 1 Minute? Go to England and buy something"

"My mom when I was a kid: ""Never talk to strangers."" ""Never get in their cars."" Me to my future kids: ""Here's how to order an Uber."""