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Joke of the Day

"I hate when a texting convo goes like this You: heyy. Them: hey! You: watzup? Them: nothin wbu? You: same. Them: cool. You: yea Them: haha. You: lol. Them: yep."

"Recent studies have shown that 67% of women have used vibrators The other 33% have brand new ones"

"NALA: Why can't you be the king I know? The king you have inside you? SIMBA: That doesn't make sense. I think I'd remember if I ate a king."

"Why should you never high-five a Roman? They might give you Hi-V back!"

"Why US didn't attack India, after twin-tower incident, looking for terrorists ? Because it didn't happen in 7/11"

"Thor isn't able to stay in hiding long He's not a very loki guy (yeah, still a bit iffy on the wording)"

"What did the elephant say to the naked guy? Pretty impressive, but can it pick up peanuts?"

"I stepped on the scale today. Not to get my weight. I just couldn't reach the cookies in the cupboard."

"You can teach a man to lead a fish to water but you can't make him drink a horse"

"There once was a man from Nantucket... who didn't know what a limerick was."