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Joke of the Day
"""Better out than in,"" my dad always used to say. Lovely man. Terrible heart surgeon."
Next Joke
"Why did the ghost go to jail? He got arrested for possession."
"Thinking of donating my beard to charity because there's so much food in it."
"Yesterday I clicked on 10 Things You Didn't Know About Denny's and number one was ""It used to be called Danny's."" get OUT of here"
"What do you say to a person at a funeral held at 10 A.M.? Good mourning."
"What did the male telescope say to the hot female telescope? HUBBLE HUBBLE!"
"Is it possible to divorce someone twice? Not re-marry and divorce again, but divorce twice so you're completely done. Like, extra divorced."
"They laughed when I said I was going to be a comedian. Well, they're not laughing now."
"Someone recently broke in to my nan's flat and stole her precious limbo trophy... How low can you get?"
"Pretty sure California's water crisis could have been solved with the number of dropped ice cubes that I've lazily kicked under the fridge."