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Joke of the Day

"A priest, a jew, and an atheist all walk into a bar... ...You'd think one of them would've seen it!"

"Women are only terrible at parking because we're constantly being lied to about what 9 inches is"

"Goes to church to find God's love. Friendzoned."

"High-definition ruined porn for me. I like my porn blurry so I can't see butt acne and herp scars."

"I ran into my ex today. Long story short, my car is totaled."

"When my teacher wanted to see an example of a ringed molecule... I got my arsole out."

"They should have never given you girls fake eyelashes. This chick just blinked and it sounded like a flock of pigeons took off."

"It must be pretty inconvenient when you meet someone from a dating site and you're already married to them."

"Policeman: Didn't you hear my siren? Motorist: Sure that's why I sped up."

"What would the blind man say every morning when he walked past the fish market? ""Good morning, ladies!"""