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Joke of the Day
"If every day is a gift, I'd like a receipt for Monday. I want to exchange it for another Friday."
Next Joke
"Eggs. Dyed for our sins."
"Why is Mortal Kombat X popular among SJWs? Because it has the Block Button. *cue the flames*"
"Why are leggings and sand the same? They both get stuck in camel toe."
"Women are like bathrooms stalls.... ....they're all dirty, except the handicap ones -Jim Jeffries"
"What do you call the statistics for the total amount of waste produced by the US this year? Gross"
"A blonde walks into a bar... Ouch."
"Whats black and sits at the top of the stairs? A paraplegic in a house fire."
"[Date] (don't let her know you're an alien larva) Her: I wonder where he is? *I burst through her chest* Me: Did you order yet? I'm starved"
"Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it. "