164208

Joke of the Day

"Did you know that 99% of Americans use the internet regularly? The other 1% are the politicians."

"Guy: Wanna go out? Girl: I have a boyfriend. Guy: It's just like soccer, just because theres a goalie doesnt mean you cant score."

"What is the phobia of chainsaws called? Common Sense"

"Well, well, well, if it isn't my inability to cope with life."

"I smoked meat yesterday... I think that's how I got salmonella."

"I've started wearing a stethoscope around my neck... So, if there's a medical emergency I get to teach people a valuable lesson about making assumptions based on someone's appearance."

"What do guns and millennials have in common? You need to keep them in a safe space if you don't want them triggered."

"I just finished doing 100 push-ups over a period of 8 years"

"Avoid unwanted pregnancies by using the ""pull out"" method where you pull out an acoustic guitar at a party & no one will have sex with you."

"Did you know diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans."