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Joke of the Day

"A free product means... to free you of your money"

"What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? Nacho Cheese."

"All of my gaming / network usernames are based on things I thought were funny at 19, and that is my greatest shame."

"Why can't a soldier look wistfully across the horizon? Because there are no gaze in the military"

"I've made the front page 5 times! The girls on /r/creepyPMs are really mean and don't understand the P means Private."

"My 5 year old still has so much to learn. I asked him for a screwdriver and he brought me some sort of tool."

"The number of STDs I can spell without autocorrect really bothers me."

"Why'd the short man take the elevator up? He was feeling down"

"I'd get in the back of their van if they told me they had a phone charger in it."

"When I order a burrito with a coffee in my hand, I imagine the cashier is thinking ""Wow, this guy must really love to shit!"""