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Joke of the Day
"My name is David and I had my ID stolen the other day. Now they just call me Dav."
Next Joke
"Women are like convertibles. They're a lot more fun when the top's down."
"No wonder 1% is so bad I got my raise, not even 1%, my bank don't even give close to 1%. But my taxes ---- **30%**."
"What do you call a female peacock? A peacunt!"
"My sister is a Cancer... ironic how she died... Killed by a giant crab."
"Sensei: always expect the unexpected *pulls out picnic blanket* Me: *instantly pulls out picnic basket* Sensei: *hands me ninja diploma*"
"What do you call a basin full of denim? A gene pool!"
"so i accidentally stabbed my friend's butt last night... but he forgave me, it was an asshole."
"I was going to say a joke about Sodium. . But Na."
"I'm guessing I'm not married because I'd take a bullet for a grilled cheese before I'd take one for a girl."