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Joke of the Day

"Want to hear a joke about Ebola? You probably won't get it"

"Can I use cash to pay for a new electric car? No, you have to charge it."

"A islamic dial ripoff made a new type of hand soap. Aloe Akbar."

"Instead of ""the John,"" I call my toilet ""the Jim."" That way it sounds better when I say I go to the Jim first thing every morning."

"What does a straight man and spaghetti have in common? They are both straight until it gets hot."

"I rarely eat kale chips, but when I do-I eat them condescendingly and self-righteously."

"Sometimes ""I'm single"" means ""I'm drama free"", ""less stressed"" and ""I refuse to settle for less."""

"I had an omelette with FIVE different types of mushroom this morning. It truly was a Breakfast of Champignons."

"Knock knock..."

"What do you call a mexican guy with a rubber toe? Roberto"