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Joke of the Day
"Why was the computer stressed out when it got home from work? 'Cause it had a hard drive."
Next Joke
"Well played, super clean sliding glass door I thought I'd left open. Well played."
"A ""gag gift"" means something completely different to people into BDSM."
"[writing own obituary before going to the zoo just in case] ""his hatred of lions was well known and dreamt of fighting one two of them"""
"How do cows do math? A cow-culator. haha haha ha ... ok, I'll leave."
"Now I know why they call it Whole Foods. It took a whole hour to spend my whole paycheck and they can kiss my whole ass."
"The entire 15 years my wife and I have been married we only had one fight and it's still not over."
"I've got the eye of the tiger, the heart of the lion... And a lifetime ban from the zoo."
"""How big do you suppose that fence is?"" ""I reckon that fence is around a yard."""
"What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist fuck!"