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Joke of the Day

"I was going to get a face-lift but I thought about my health and went for face-stairs instead"

"I have a girlfriend named Refrigerator She always opens up to me"

"I saw Jesus on the bus today. He was the Juan in front of me."

"Lesbian Vampires What did one lesbian vampire say to the other? See you next month! Credit : /u/andrej88"

"What moisturiser do bullfighters use? Olay."

"We could use Thor and his hammer to solve all our energy problems... I see the headlines already ""Earth powered by Generathor""."

"Having sex with a pregnant woman is like putting gas in a car that you've already wrecked. That's why I pull into the self serve"

"I wonder if the coach of the opposing team on Air Bud got fired when he explained to the principal how a golden retriever outscored his team"

"Not funny, people. I lost both my parents to a Hot Tub Time Machine."

"Ey gurl, is your name Andromeda? Because you got a heavenly body! It's 5:50AM and I still can't sleep."