43638

Joke of the Day

"Lesbian Vampires What did one lesbian vampire say to the other? See you next month! Credit : /u/andrej88"

"Star wars dad joke heard tonight Dad ""Chewbacca seems kinda big for an ewok..."" Me ""he's a wookie. "" Dad ""he can't be, he's been in lots of movies now."""

"Someone told me I was ""good people"" and I replied ""OMG you can hear them too?"""

"If you fall down in public the best thing to do is stay down, use your fingernails to dig your way to another country then start a new life."

"I just ran a .003048K"

"Superman and Eyore had a baby. The baby's name? Supereyore"

"My young nephew said that people with glasses should only be able to marry other people with glasses. He's like a tiny Republican senator."

"When a dating site tells me ""Someone new likes you!"" I get angry because I'm there to meet adults, not babies."

"God: I made a rainbow! Devil: I'm making all the fire alarm batteries die in the middle of the night."

"Thought for today: Each day is a gift from God ... but not Monday, it was regifted by Satan."