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Joke of the Day

"A vegan invited my friends and I to a vegan restaurant.... the food really lettuce down."

"I carry a backpack full of receipts and gum wrappers and go through it while I'm at a cashier until someone who's frustrated pays for me."

"Wait, there's a big difference. Did you say I look like THE Rock or did you say I look like A rock?"

"Why is Reddit full of liberals? All the conservatives are out working."

"I couldn't decide whether or not to buy this new king sized mattress I'm going to sleep on it."

"What does a meditating cow say? .ooOOOMMMMOOOOOooooo........"

"There are 10 types of people in the world Those who get binary and those who don't."

"At this point journalism school probably boils down to, ""Just say what everyone tweeted."""

"If we can put a satellite in orbit around a comet 4 billion miles away, perhaps someday we can put a working wireless printer in my office."

"Why do Buddhists always buy 1 ply toilet paper? Because they like to get in touch with their inner self."