191893

Joke of the Day

"If we can put a satellite in orbit around a comet 4 billion miles away, perhaps someday we can put a working wireless printer in my office."

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"My elderly grandfather came over and complained of diarrhea. He repeatedly told everyone ""Shh"". It took us a while to realize he'd lost ""it""."
"What do you call a guy with 4 penises who can breathe underwater? Aquatic."
"Q: Why can't you hear a viola on a digital recording? A: Recording technology has reached such an advanced level of development that all extraneous noise is eliminated."
"What do you call Israelis that overly spray tan? Orange Jews!"
"Maybe teenagers just aren't strong enough yet to remove the sticker from their hat"
"What do toilet paper and the Starship Enterprise have in common? They both circle Uranus looking for Klingons."
"What did they change the name of the gay bar in Orlando to? No Pulse"
"I'm reading a book about anti-gravity It's impossible to put down"
"Psychic: *rubbing temples* You want to know if your wife's trying to murder you Me: How'd you know? P: *sees knife in my back* I'm good"
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