162009

Joke of the Day

"Why didn't the Chinese guy get any time off from work when he told them about his son's death? They didn't bereave him"

"Why are the reddit servers down so much? Because they're being beaten like a dead horse."

"On an analog clock, 6:30 is the best time of day... Hands down"

"What's the difference between Jelly and Jam? I can't jelly my cock up your ass"

"If future me us reading this some how, please reply ASAP Need help with my life"

"Why can't a bicycle stand on its own? Because its two tired."

"[working at Bed Bath & Beyond] ME: Hi there, may I help you? What are you looking for? CUSTOMER: Shower head. ME: Sir, please, we just met."

"What do you call a heard of masturbating cows? ....Beef stroganoff"

"I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger Then it hit me."

"Ever been so drunk that you cooked a pizza at 20 degrees for 350 minutes?"