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Joke of the Day

"I met an elderly at the park and asked him what was going on? He smiled and told me ""I have Parkinson"""

"I don't understand chinese philosophy. It Confucius me."

"A Man to a lady sitting next to him in flight. Man: ""Which perfume do you use ? It smells good. I want to buy one for my wife."" Lady: ""Please don't. Some idiot will have an excuse to talk to her."""

"Don't make fun of Kanye when he's talking to his reflection That would be two Yeezy"

"Detective: Where were you on the night- Me: Twitter Detective: Between the hour- Me: Twitter Detective: I wasn't fini- Me: Twitter"

"What's got four legs, is green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of tree it could kill you? A pool table."

"I'd tell a 9/11 joke... But the only two I know always fall flat."

"I found this addvertisement along the road in Texas Don't Texan drive."

"What does a guy think in the middle of a blowjob? Fuck i'm broke."

"""How much are these glasses?"" ""$150 sir"" ""I guess you could say"" *puts on sunglasses* *runs out without another word*"