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Joke of the Day

"I want a tattoo but i'm afraid to get one. Not because it's permanent or the pain. I just don't want to talk to a stranger for 7 hours."

"Blonde Brain Cells Q: How do blondes' brain cells die? A: Alone."

"What does Tumblr and KFC's chicken have in common? They both contain high amounts of trans fats. Edit: Omg guys! I didn't expect this to take off this much, thanks guys!"

"I asked Rick Astley to lend me some Pixar movies...... He said you can take Cars, you can take Toy Story but I'm never gonna give you Up."

"An Xbox One got into a fight with a PS4 The ambulance came. Wii U Wii U Wii U."

"Which ant is the biggest? Elephant"

"Vodka and I go together like falling down the stairs and getting fucked in my sleep."

"Did you hear they found life on Mars? But, Curiosity killed the cat."

"White lies Don't matter. But black lies matter."

"Whats blue and bangs old ladies? Me in my lucky blue coat."