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Joke of the Day

"Stormtroopers never miss. They're just trained to fire a 21 shot salute to celebrate the commencement of every firefight."

"What do all battered women have in common? They don't listen."

"My grandma can hold her breath for over sixteen years!"

"Carefully choosing my grocery check out line based on the back of who's head I want to beam hate into for the next 15 minutes."

"A football supporter's favourite Christmas song? 'Yule never walk alone'"

"Why do some accountants decide to become actuaries? They find bookkeeping too exciting."

"Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippy? He was too far out, maan!"

"I posted a joke via USPS... ...not sure if it was their fault or mine, but the delivery of the punchline was completely botched."

"I told my girlfriend she'd look better with her hair back Apparently that's not an appropriate thing to say to a chemo patient"

"A magnet walks into a bar...., what does he order? Nothing... he's still stuck to the entrance."