160631

Joke of the Day

"My wife likes to talk on the phone when she's having sex. The other day, she called me from a hotel."

"My lesbian friend asked what I wanted for my birthday... ... All I got was this stupid rolex!"

"Why didn't Abraham Lincoln go to jail? Because he was in-a-cent!"

"Don't forget to put everybody before her so she has no clue whether you really give a shit or not"

"Sneaky? Dude, I got two handfuls of soup into a movie theater once."

"My catchphrase is ""Just smell the money, baby"". I can't use it yet (I don't have money), please don't steal it"

"I bought a vacant piece of land recently, and every night someone keeps depositing soil on the land. I still can't figure out who it is. The plot thickens."

"Never trust a woman who doesn't b*tch about everything."

"It has been reported that listening to the band Queen links to giving you autism due to the high Mercury content."

"I need Bill Belicheck jokes pledge task please help"