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Joke of the Day

"How do you make holy water? You just take normal water and boil the hell out of it."

"What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber? Nothing, you can't cross a vector with a scalar."

"Waiter there's a fly in my soup! Its OK Sir there's no extra charge!"

"Two muffins are sitting in an oven One looks to the other and says ""man it's hot in here"" The other looks back and says ""HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN"""

"What do you call a Chinese cameraman? Phil Ming"

"I have lots of great personality traits. Or as my doctor calls them, symptoms."

"My girlfriend is always such a sourpuss. Maybe I should stop using lemon flavored condoms."

"I knew that psychic wasn't legit when she let me write a check."

"What is the least racist animal? A panda. It's black, it's white and it's Asian."

"Did you guys hear about that crazy thing Trump said at the debate last night? I couldn't believe it. He said ""Ohio is a spectacular place."""