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Joke of the Day

"Apparently ""Which one?"" wasn't the best answer when my gf's dad asked me ""What are your intentions with my daughter?"""

"I grow herbs in my bed. Bed thyme."

"I don't like nosey peppers they get Jalapeno buisness"

"I can tell everything I need to know about your business by the thickness of your bathroom toilet paper."

"If Bernie gets elected we should give him an honorary military rank. Colonel sounds right to me."

"I'm on the steak diet. You just have four steaks for breakfast, four for lunch, then a sensible dinner of six steaks."

"What did the Muslim Terrorist say when he bombed Hawaii? Oahu Akbar!"

"Do you guys remember the joke about Jonestown... Me neither but I heard the punch line killed em'"

"Good mothers let you lick the beaters when they're making a cake. Great mothers turn the mixer off first."

"What's the most popular song at the new Freddie Mercury night club? Dancing Queen."