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Joke of the Day

"Why didn't the rest of the fractions like ""mc"" very much? Because he was generally known to be a square(ed)."

"I recently saw a video of a lady in a burkha do the ice bucket challege. She accidentally water boarded herself."

"""Did you guys see me get so mad I flipped a table?"" Yes Tony, we saw it. You're 46. You have to stop taking your skateboard to restaurants."

"How can you get a million dollars in a week? Start with 10 million and become a day-trader."

"Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And then a table, and then a stool."

"What do you call a gay rubber band? An elasstickle"

"If you could choose between world peace and 1 million dollars... What would you buy?"

"What did the cop say to Boris Yosanavich after pulling him over for speeding? Quit Russian."

"What do you call a penis with bad logic? A phallusy."

"Everyone's like ""the things I want for Christmas can't be bought."" And I'm like ""Legos. I want legos."""