160483

Joke of the Day

"Why didn't the rest of the fractions like ""mc"" very much? Because he was generally known to be a square(ed)."

"What do Monica Lewinsky and a soda machine have in common? They both say insert Bill here"

"What do Mike Jones and an owl have in common? Who?"

"What song does Freddy Krueger listen to when he gets a manicure? I got Kniiiiiives on it! [Original Song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YyDqoLimejg) that inspired the joke."

"I got a job as a triangle player in a Reggae band... I just stand at the back and ting"

"Where do the Chinese study? In the Pupils republic of China"

"How do you change the light bulb in the dark? You don't. The police shoot you."

"ME: [leaning over toilet] Hold back my hair YOU: Ok ME: [drinks from toilet like dog] YOU: You've made your point I'll wash up some glasses"

"I always read my wife's Horoscope to see what kind of day I'M going to have."

"If State Farm were such a good neighbor they'd come over and pick up all the dog shit in my yard."